Marriage During COVID-19

Maintain Awareness Know that you are not alone. Many marriages are experiencing stress and strain during this unprecedented time, and we can’t expect we will have a problem-free life. Understand that serious challenges don’t mean you can’t overcome them. Just because you are feeling discouraged in your marriage doesn’t mean you can’t do anything about it. You can use this time as an opportunity to tune in and reset in your marriage as needed.

Recognize Every Relationship Takes Work Marriage over the course of a lifetime needs nourishment in order to survive and thrive. This nourishment can include love, honor, respect, and acceptance. Other key essentials for a healthy relationship can include encouragement, a sense that we are growing together in the same direction, emotional connection, friendship, trust, and commitment.

Talk About Stress In Healthy Ways How well do you and your spouse handle stress individually and together? There are tools that can help you diffuse stress. The purpose of this exercise is to find a healthy way to diffuse stress by remembering the acronym LESS:

L = listen E = empathic S = supportive S = stands with Problem-solving is not allowed during this conversation. Taking turns talking about stress in this manner can help couples understand one another better and lessen their feelings of stress.

Notice Hardships and Discuss Them Take pause during this time and reflect on the state of your marriage. What are you noticing? Evaluating the hardships in your marriage can actually strengthen your marriage. The following areas can be used as a guide to get you started:

Financial Challenges: Many families are feeling squeezed, stretched, and strapped by financial pressures during COVID-19. If this is true for you and your spouse, this is a good time to recognize and discuss how it is impacting both of you. Come up with a financial strategy for how you will get through this time. Remember you are in this together. You are a team.

Friendship: Are you and your spouse growing in your friendship? Does your spouse feel like they are known by you? Do you feel known by your spouse? Try asking one another. Ask questions to check in and see how well you really know your spouse. It’s quite possible with the busy-ness of life that you have been missing each other. Take this time to reset your friendship.

Communication Patterns: How we communicate with our spouse matters. Years together can create a communication rhythm that can be positive or negative. How are you speaking to one another? Are you speaking with kindness and respect? Or have you fallen into negative communication patterns using criticism, avoidance, or impatience?

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