Mercy Aigbe, Adekaz... the story that keeps giving.

ON MERCY, ADEKAZ, AND THE POLITICS OF NIGERIAN MARRIAGES

Its no news for most people, that Mercy Aigbe, a Nigerian actress and celebrity recently got married to her boo. It must have been a happy joyous occasion on that side of the planet, while on another side of the globe, there was a betrayed woman and her three children who struggled to understand, not the reason he (their husband/father) decided to marry another wife, but why he picked Mercy, of all possible options in the world!

For a short background, Adekaz, the man in question is a Nigerian businessman who used to be married to a woman named Funsho and they lived happily in the United States. At some point in their relationship, he decided that he wanted to move back to Nigeria permanently, but Funsho didn’t want the same thing. She had built a life in Minnesota and didn’t want to have to start from scratch back home. Maybe she even has other legitimate reasons to stay put... but the story is that she refused to come back home to Nigeria. Adekaz moved back home as he planned, leaving his wife and kids in the US while he pursued a new life here at home.

But after three years, he was done waiting for his wife to change her mind and he decided to marry someone else who would stay in the country with him and build the new life that he wanted. The woman he decided on was our darling, gorgeous Mercy... (angsts aside... the man has good tastes cos.... Mercy fiiiiiiiiiiine!!!)

So anyhow, the wedding goes viral, and so does a picture of Mercy, her Abusive ex husband Gentry, Adekaz, and his now somewhat estranged wife Funsho that was taken many years ago. Even then, Mercy was a looker. But I digress. The picture steals the day, week, month and information mills' attention over the wedding. The rumours were that Mercy Aigbe and her Abusive ex husband (note that I keep reminding you that Lanre Gentry is an abuser? Good.) used to be family friends with Funsho and Adekaz. This would suggest that Adekaz married his friend's ex wife and the world doesn’t seem to mind much because look... all the stories and snide comments aren’t directed towards him! When you however flip the script and we are talking about the fact Mercy Aigbe married her abusive ex husband's acquaintance, (which is what they really are) for some reason, the world just doesn’t like that. Because how dare Mercy be happy? And how dare Funsho choose her happiness and support system over a husband who was already serially cheating on her, knowing fully well that he wasn’t even invested in the marriage, which was why he would give ultimatums such as “uproot your life and relocate to Nigeria with me or I’ll marry another wife and potentially make you and our children miserable forever!”

But again... I digress.

The truth is that what we are seeing play out with Adekaz, Mercy Aigbe, Funsho and abusive Gentry is the typical Nigerian misogynistic family and marriage system. Gentry hears that Mercy married someone else, and he rushes to upload pictures of him and the new husband with her and his wife in the picture. With an apparent intention of souring whatever happiness Mercy hopes to get from a man who couldn’t be bothered to see things from his first wife’s perspective and maybe have a conversation that would lead to a sane and fair compromise between the two before choosing to replace her for clout. Gentry at his very best... still trying to control and manipulate mercy’s life even years after she left him.

Ah... and then there is the pesky miss Tolulade whose take on why polygamy isn’t so bad these days (especially in the case of Adekaz, because I have a feeling she would sing a different tune if her own husband responded to her exercising her right to self determination in this way) is that Adekaz continues to be financially responsible for his children’s education. Not a special day, just us women glorifying the bare minimum men once again. Bringing the fact that he pays tuition into a conversation about his blatant disrespect for his wife, and the emotional trauma that his kids are probably experiencing at the moment.

But all is well that ends well. Adekaz gets his trophy wife, Mercy gets her trophy husband and Funsho gets her freedom (sort of) from a marriage that has been more stressful than anything else for a while now. The only true loser in this game is Gentry... the abuser.